Thursday, May 26, 2011

A Blogger's Confessions II: Liars and Deceivers

Hi All...readers and passer-bys alike. Really,thanks for taking off your valuable time to stop by this watershedding memoirs once again. If you are new to what is going on,you might hoover your mouse over here and quickly familiarise yourself.

It might seem that i kept mute after that last post,but i can assure you that there hardly is ever any moment of quiet reverie beneath the worlds of blogger templates. That is really why i flagged that last post - to draw attention to all that happens hereon blogsville after the neat and tidy posts and cushy commentaries.

I've been swamped with emails from all concerned in the episode i knowingly kicked off. Clearly i stirred up a hornet's nest, but ya'll know i'm not one to give up on a good ol ruckus. Haha! Moreso when e-mails started involving namecallings and mudslinging from three certain female bloggers and one other big head dude!What!!!Don't be testing me and my big mouth ooo!!!Hehehe.

So,Mena put up a response, as she told me she would. But comeon Babes,you underestimate and take for granted the level of people's intelligence on blogger! Everybody can see thru that post and quickly tell that that was a weak attempt to make jest of a real happening! Any 5 year old can see that!Come on Love!

So,here's what i'll do, i'll take things up just one last notch,and i'll call a truce before things get ugly. I could be the bigger man and just stop it all here right now, but you know you hit the sore spot on that bit of "Mena: 'Thanks, but I don't smoke." when in all truth,ahem,we both know who smoked who!!!

So,give me a moment to pull out my wild cards,and i'll lay a little bit of the hard facts and evidence on the table. They say pictures don't lie uh?!Hmmmm.....P.S. Mena can stop this all right now by admitting that there was ABSOLUTELY no shred of lie in my last post,else i'll go ahead and strip the whole gist NAKED! P.P.S Musco was right earlier when he pre-empted that something really happened and i pulled that quick post to try to justify myself before the other party started singing. The question though is, who's the fibber, and who's the born again blogger here?!Double winks.

Remember how they say,"the wind is not your friend when you're wearing tight thongs and a loose skirt". Well,not really sure if anybody ever quoted that one,but it sure sounds kinky to me!

Round 2 is drawn open. Call truce now,or else we both bleed. Me,i no send!
(Walks away singing, "got nothing to loose,i ain't got nothing to loose,nothing to loose...")

Sunday, May 22, 2011

A blogger's confessions...Bloggers I have "met".

Further to my being born again, I have now decided to officially and publicly confess all my attrocities, many of which were accelerated here on blogsville, by same bloggers anyways. Some have argued that it is not my place to publicly call out my fellow partners-in-crime, which is true. However at the same time, out of sheer boredom, i have dusted out the burgundy diaries, and decided, hey “what the heck, let’s ruffle some feathers, let it all out, have a laugh at the ruckus, and when we’re done, bow out of blogger with the widest Cheshire cat grin ever!”

Ehmm,admittedly, some people are not going to like this, because when i refer to the burgundy diaries, i am talking unashamedly honest hard facts, but heyy comeon,lets all live-a-little-a-little more uh! (Lighten up folks!) So, i’m just going to have a blast and countdown to the annihilation of this little blog space. That's the beauty of annonymous blogging-you can just walk away from it all! Press play on my cruel intentions soundtrack here, then continue reading. (You know how you sometimes just get tired of all the neat and tidy blogging!)

Title Entry#1: Mena Udoko is ready, is she really?

After my first and only date with Mena, I am not proud to admit that my crotch literally needed an icepack for the rest of the night. Hear me out first before you let your mind run away with you.

12am. Hendon, London.
Mn: You’re joking TN. After ditching a proper working bloke, you’re telling me that’s all you have to offer! (She cursed me in Benin lingua).

Mena was not the first girl i dated off blogger, so note that this is not in a chronological order of event. Also note that by the word date, i only mean casual outing and some ‘hums, as you will find out. Also respect the fact that in all cases, both parties were duly aware of the irresponsible and non-committal nature of our shenanigans. Nobody was seeking for a marriage partner, so a little less judgemental now. Besides, as far as i know, i am now born again and going to heaven, but as for the rest of the people involved, only they can tell.

Skype Conversation. November 2010, 1am (Edited conversation)

TN: Watcha doing up at this evil hour?
Mn: (Shrugs) Can’t sleep. You?
TN: Coursework. Whatsup?
Mn: Close the frigging books and keep an idle girl company jor!
TN: Grrr. Books closed. What’s on your mind?
Mn: The date yesterday was shit. Don’t you even dare say i told you so.
TN: Na you know. Should i count how many times i’ve asked you out. Your shakara pass shakira’s own!
Mn: That was lame! Zero over hundred, i’m disappointed. Hiss.
TN: I’ll be working in London next week. Let’s check out mo*vida. You know you won’t be disappointed.

Mn: Forget it, I’m not going out with you TNotes.
TN: I’ll be done at work about 8pm. I’ll call you.
Mn: My phone will be off by 7.55.
TN: I hear you. Anyways, why is your web cam off?
MN: You don’t want to know.
Insert black and white content screen filter here.

BB,London 9pm.

TN: Yo!
Mn: Ds is ur 8pm abi?
TN: Oyinbo ppl too lyk work. Didn’t release us til 8.45. Will b on the Victoria in 5. Meet@oxford?
Mn: Changed my mind, not in party mood 2nyt. Maybe if you called 45mins earlier.
TN: K. No wahala. L8r.

PhoneCall, Hendon,London (Mena’s crib) 36 mins later

TN: It’s cold. Abeg come and open the door.
Mn: Which door?!!!
Tn: Heritage avenue ofcourse! Don’t let your neighbours call the police for black man standing at the door!
Mn: Idiot! Did i ask you to....

Face-to-Face 10.10pm.

Mn: TNotes!!!
TN: (Whistles)
Mn: You Idiot, did i ask you to come to my house!
TN: (Tried to enter apartment) Why are you dressed up - i thought you said you were not interested in mo*vida.
Mn: (Restricted my movement) Well, I was, until I had a proper date.
TN: (Pushed her hand aside, stepped in and shut patio door) So you ditched me for all these innit boys.
Mn: He’s not a broke ass M.Sc student like you.
TN: Abeg jare, I have prospects! You know the guy is boring as hell, let’s smoke him out and hit town.
Mn: (Hushed tone) Keep your voice down now. We’ll hook up some other time.
TN: Lai lai. I’m gate crashing. If we had done mo*vida as planed, we’d be out till 4a.m. Now however, i’m homeless till trains start service in the morning.
Mn: (She was getting impatient) T.N, you have other friends in London jor!
TN: Mena, there’s no two ways about it. With this monostrap mini thingy you’ve got going on, i am crashing at your place. She you had mouth on blogger and skype with all the illicit talking.
Mn: Are you not hearing me, i am on a date!
TN: (I know i am wicked, but i was laughing loudly as i forced my way into the living room space): Date or booty call, which of the above?
I enter the living room, and guess who was sitting sprawled like a lazy hippo on the mid-sofa!

Disclaimer: This is T.Note's handiwork.Any beef should be directed at him-I swear, I have no idea how this post got in here!

Saturday, May 21, 2011

I h*a*t*e Blogging!

It is really as simple as that!

Oh,and to be honest,i really don't like some bloggers. They just act and talk alot of s*h#iT! P.S...if i have ever confessed my love to you on your blogg,then i really do want to hook up with you. If however i dislike you,i just skim thru,SMH and usually leave no comments,at least until now.

I think i'm a crummy mood and just took it out on someone. WTH..whatever!

Friday, May 13, 2011

Bitter Sweet Victories: Still Standing, Standing Still.

PostGrad Term2 Results were awesome!

It's bittersweet because aside from that, everything is pretty much a mess.
(Side laughs),you don't even want to know the extent,so let's just leave that one between me and the God who only can sort things out at this level...

But in the awesomely encouraging words of inyamu's eldorado,we might be barren and broken,but still blessed and beautiful!

On my replay list is:

You know the kind of victories where you want to laugh out loud, but you can't because the celebration seems like a lone gem amidst of so much mess all around.

Results were awesome,as in,really.


Wednesday, May 4, 2011

All T.Notes go to Heaven!

T.Notes gave his Life to Jesus and got baptised yesterday!

No more flirting around with female bloggers; No more evil escapades. From now on, All T.Notes go to heaven!!!Aye Aye!!!

Then today, we settled down in the library to kill off some dissertation work, and guess who saunters in with the juicest behind i have ever seen in all my life! Ooooh,this born again thing!Ever notice that there's atimes a fine divide line between the commitments you make in prayers and when you open your eyes to 'real life afterwards"?